Empathy is about connecting to someone else’s feelings. You see what they’re feeling and relate it to your own experiences. It’s why most cards designed for people who are grieving say “Our Sympathies.”
Sympathy is about sharing a bad fate with another person or feeling pity for their suffering. It can also mean a shallow understanding of another’s emotions.
What is Empathy?
Empathy is the ability to understand and share another person’s emotions. It’s the ability to imagine yourself in a situation and feel what they are feeling, or to connect with their feelings on an emotional level (emotional empathy). You may also identify with their feelings intellectually, which is considered cognitive empathy.
You could think of a friend who is in a stressful situation, like losing their job, and you try to put yourself in their shoes. You can see their stress and even start to feel it yourself. You might also sympathize with a friend who stubs their toe and feel the pain.
If you’re in a relationship with someone who seems to lack empathy, it might be worth considering walking away if necessary. A lack of empathy can lead to unhealthy relationships and is a sign that they may not be able to fully listen to you, or they may think your emotional reactions aren’t valid.
What is Sympathy?
Sympathy is an emotion that evokes feelings of pity and sorrow for someone else’s negative emotions and circumstances. It is also a form of caring that can lead to helping others. Sympathy is a System 1 emotion.
For example, you may feel sympathy for someone who is suffering after being reprimanded at work. You can express your sympathies by telling them you are sorry that they had to be disciplined.
Studies show that people are more likely to feel sympathy for members of their social group than those outside the group. This is because groups are interconnected and share successes and failures.
The roots of the word sympathy are from the Greek words sym and pathos, meaning “together with pain.” While this is a good indication of the emotion’s root, research suggests that it actually involves more than just relating to the other person’s experiences. It also requires that you believe that the other person is worthy of your attention and help.
How do I know if I’m using Empathy or Sympathy in my writing?
Sympathy is a feeling of pity for someone else’s misfortune, while empathy is the ability to understand and share another person’s feelings. Empathy is thought to be made up of three components: cognitive empathy, emotive empathy, and empathic action. Cognitive empathy is when you imagine yourself in the situation of another person. For example, if you are a parent and your child fails a test, you can use cognitive empathy to connect with their emotions and help them move on.
Sympathetically wishing that they could succeed is one of the most common forms of this type of empathy. This is also why so many cards designed to be sent to people who have lost someone say “Our Sympathies.”
To be empathetic you must be willing to put yourself in the shoes of your reader, even if it doesn’t affect you in the same way. For example, if a coworker is struggling to keep up with their work, you might empathize by telling them you’ve experienced the same thing and offer your best time-saving techniques.
How do I know if I’m using Sympathy or Empathy in my speech?
The words sympathy and empathy are sometimes used interchangeably, but they have distinct meanings. Sympathy is about feeling sorry for someone, while empathy is about understanding and sharing their feelings. Understanding the difference between these two emotions can help us to better connect with others.
Empathy involves actually experiencing the person’s feelings as if they were your own. This requires a certain amount of vulnerability. It’s like the old saying, “walk a mile in their shoes.”
Sympathy on the other hand is more of a cognitive response. It involves recognizing the person’s suffering, but does not include the feeling of shared experience. Sympathy can be helpful when connecting with acquaintances or strangers who are suffering, before you really know them well enough to empathize.
Both are important and can have positive effects on the people around you. However, it’s important to understand the difference between them so you can choose which one is best for a given situation.